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Titik Nol

Pulang Kampung adalah the most significant thing I have done so far. Keputusan untuk PulKam bukanlah suatu keputusan yang gampang, karena Nie harus mengalahkan (atau lebih tepatnya mengalah pada) semua idealisme yang selama ini Nie cangking (bawa) ke Aceh.

Nie pengen membuat kehidupan masyarakat menjadi lebih baik. Nie pengen menyentuh kehidupan mereka dan membawa perubahan. Nie pengen tidak ada lagi masyarakat yang menderita akibat dampak tsunami.

Tapi ternyata idealisme itu malah menjadi beban dan penghalang buat Nie. Nie, yang awalnya berpikir bahwa masyarakat di Aceh itu sangat membutuhkan, sangat perlu di bantu, sangat kasihan karena efek tsunami, ternyata mendapati bahwa masyarakat Aceh tuh sangat kaya raya. Hanya moral dan spiritual mereka yang perlu dibantu.

Nie sedih. Nie kecewa. Nie patah hati.

Most of us pasti pernah patah hati, mostly karena pacar atau pasangan hidup kita. Let’s talk about patah hati karena pacar. Kadang kita begitu sayangnya ama pacar kita, kita bener-bener yakin dia itu baek, nggak aneh-aneh, dan sesuai dengan apa yang kita pikirkan. Then, pop! Ternyata dia adalah makhluk yang sangat-sangat berbeda dengan semua bayangan kita. Dia jahat. Dia penipu. Dia selingkuh.

Then, patah hati, of course.

Yap, itulah yang Nie rasakan. Nie benar-benar patah hati. Bahkan sekarang, untuk kembali lagi ke Aceh, Nie belum mau. Nie merasa dikhianati.

Most of you mungkin masih ingat post Nie yang tentang Aceh. Yah, itulah beberapa hal yang membuat Nie akhirnya mundur. Kemunduran Nie ini bukan karena Nie merasa tidak mampu atau tidak mau berhadapan dengan mereka, tapi Nie merasa, orang-orang Aceh yang katanya membutuhkan bantuan, yang katanya miskin, ternyata memiliki lebih dari cukup. Dan Nie kemudian berpikir, bahwa masih banyak masyarakat yang sama sekali belum mengecap bantuan atau, yang banyak orang bilang dengan hidup enak.

Yes, here I am, pulang lagi ke Surabaya. Memulai lagi dari nol.

Dan memang benar teman-teman, Nie sekarang lagi merangkak untuk menyentuh kehidupan masyarakat di kota kelahiran Nie sendiri, Surabaya. Starting from my own family, then Nie sekarang rutin mengunjungi penjara-penjara di Jawa Timur. Kemarin ini, Nie uda ke Malang dan Madiun. Trus, Nie juga kasih les inggris untuk anak-anak pemulung yang bersekolah di salah satu SD di daerah Surabaya Barat. Kemarin, Nie bertelpon dengan Pak Johny, staf Wahana Visi, dan dia menceritakan pelayanannya ke gang dolly. Yap, as you may have guessed, Nie akan coba ke sana juga.

Busy? Yes.
Nie merangkak dari bawah, mencoba untuk mencapai satu titik yang lebih atas, untuk menyuntikkan idealisme Nie tentang kemanusiaan, sambil terus berbuat sesuatu yang manusiawi, dengan tidak melupakan bahwa Nie adalah manusia yang juga butuh aktivitas manusia, seperti istirahat dan bersosialisasi.

Indeed, di titik nol ini Nie banyak diubah, digembleng, di-training oleh Tuhan, seperti layaknya emas. Semakin dilebur, semakin kinclong!

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