Skip to main content

Single Vs Married

It occurs to me that marriage life ain't that fun! Don't you agree?

(LOL, please continue reading this if you find my first statement a bit annoying or offensive for some. )


I was quite reluctant to get married a few months ago, just because I'd seen so many marriages that just didn't work, for many different reasons. I just didn't want to bury myself, neither I want to fall into the same hole.

But now I am (more) open to the idea of marriage, but it occurs to me that people that already got married (that I know or hear about) don't enjoy the fun as much as we, the singles.

Agree, disagree?

Here, let me share some stories I heard about marriage couples I know or met:
  1. "Sally, I can't sleep over at your place anymore. I am married now. It's different now. My husband wouldn't like it."
  2. "Do you want to help at this event? It is one week event. You can earn extra money." "No, I am married now. It's different."
  3. "Hey, where is James? You are quite close to him, right? I haven't seen him for agess!" "Yeah, I hardly see him now. Hm, you know, I'm married. I don't think it's not right to have a male friend when you are married."
  4. "Hey, let's have a cuppa tea next week." "Next week? I guess I have to ask my husband whether I am allowed to have a cuppa tea next week." "Do you have any plans with him?" "No, just I need to ask his permission."

And some more similar statements that I think it is very peculiar, or rather very boring.

I hope I can still have male friends and go out with them when I am married. I hope I can go out with my girl friends, can sleep over at their places once in a while, or join some fun activities.

In Indonesia, we have a saying "nanti orang bilang apa?" which means "what people would say about it." Going out with male friends, I guess it is a quite sensitive issue. Thus, I guess some of my Indonesian girl friends are dealing with this issue. However, imho, if you are open with your husband about it, you can just ignore about what people are saying about it, toch?

Anywaayyy, since I am not yet married, I don't think I am the right person to tell you what to do.

I am just sharing my thoughts here :D

Comments

anakkubintang said…
Heiii,, just accidentally found this blog and like it.. yayy!!!! I link you

Eniwei, I also have the same thought abt marriage life. I hope, I still have a LOOOOTTT of fun with friends.


Salam kenal ya :)
pOe said…
hahahaha....nggak segitunya kali ni. tergantung pasangan masing2 juga.

lagipula, kadang aku berpikir bahwa sebenarnya orang2 yang kamu sebutin di nomor 1-4 itu bisa jadi emang suka diperlakukan demikian. so, it's not that they felt oppressed by their husband.

nah, kalau memang merasa terganggu dengan perlakukan suami yang begitu, ya harus berjuang untuk mendapatkan kebebasan yang kita inginkan. asal bukan kebabasan yang berlebihan. :)

and the hell what people said about us. they don't live our life, why should we care?
Oma Nia said…
@bintang: salam kenal juga. glad you like this blog :)i mostly share my personal stories here, so i hope you don't get annoyed with that :P

@poe: yes, some of my friends do enjoy be treated like that, which kinda amazed me! how could they?? :P

I still have some friends who can still have fun after they got married. so, if I ever get married, I hope can be like them.

Popular posts from this blog

What would you do if you could live another life

What would you do if you could live another life just for one day? This line is quoted from "Last Chance Harvey" . I have watched this film twice and still feel so touched everytime I watch it. Kate Walker, the main character in this film, uttered this question to Harvey Shine. In this story, both of them lived a life that is not very happy-chappy. Kate lived in a pathetic, boring life; Harvey in a screwed one. When Kate asked this question, both of them seem to ponder: what if I could live a different life, just for one day, just to try out. This question makes me ponder, too: what would I do if I was given a chance to live any kind of life I want, just for one day? Where would I be? What would I do? Who would I be? Lately I have been thinking about the life I am living right now. Everything is so well-planned. I graduated from high school, went abroad to study, came back home to work, went abroad again to do my master, working in a reasonably good organisation, and going ho...

The unexpected wedding

Almost every girl has ever dreamt of her wedding day – what she would wear, who would come, who the prince charming is. I would say, every girl must have a certain expectation and standard when it comes to a wedding: it could be grand, small celebration, family only, destination wedding – you name it. My dream wedding happens to me a small, close friends and family only wedding. If you grew up in the 90s, you would know a boy band called 98 degree. They had a song titled ‘I do’. If you search on YouTube, you will find the video clip, which shows a beautiful wedding ceremony. That’s my dream wedding! My whole life, I was picturing that. Twelve years ago, I started dating this guy, who is now my husband. His family background is very different than mine. Among other things – which we thankfully have tolerated and worked on – the way to throw a wedding party is totally different. His dream wedding party is ‘tell the world I am getting married’-kind of party. Yes, he wanted grand...

Cold Feet

One of my closest friends is getting married tomorrow another one in May another one in November. and an ex-classmate is also getting married in April/May. and, I dreamed about getting married last night. I remember some months ago I was so enthusiastic with the idea of getting married. Although I knew that our relationship was not yet ready for that stage, I was so pushy to Stefy. I had asked him when exactly we would get married. Ah well, it was all the flashy things that I longed for. Right now, what I want is to avoid it! I am just not brave enough to throw myself into this new status. Don't get me wrong, I am probably just like any other girls out there who like the beautiful wedding gown, like to be made up, like to be the queen of the night. But, have you ever considered what would happen after you wave off the guests and head to your own home, starting your new chapter of life? or what would happen after the happy chappy honeymoon? Would we then live...