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Third Culture Student: Identity Crisis

This year is my 8th year being abroad, and finally I suffer from this identity crisis. This is something that I have kinda expected to happen.

Third Culture kid actually refers to those who, as children, have spent some of their growing up years in a foreign country, and who don't have a sense of belonging to the passport country. But, I feel that I can relate to this term, too.

From my (almost) 26 years living in this earth, I have spent 8 years in a foreign country: Holland. To make things more complicated, I am Chinese by ethnic; but my passport says I am Indonesian. I speak Bahasa Indonesia, English and Dutch (in fluency order), and understand a tiny bit of Chinese.

These facts make me a Third-Cultur Student (just because my initial purpose of stay abroad was to study).

I realised that I suffer from identity crisis two days ago, just when Holland lost the world cup game against Spain.

When the world cup started, I initially didn't have particular team that I liked. I just went with the flow. My housemate thought that Spain would win (no, my housemate is not called Paul; and he doesn't happend to be an octopus). My boyfriend was in favour of England, Spain, Brazil, and a bit of Germany. Ah, actually he was for the best team. So, there I was, clueless about which team would win the world cup 2010.

Then, when Holland was in the final, I was really enthusiastic about it. I bought some orange stuffs. I watched the match in the midst of so many orange fans in North Sea Jazz - squeezed in the midst of giant Dutch people. And I enjoyed it!

When Holland lost, I was so disappointed. I wasn't crying, like some other people in North Sea Jazz, or like some of my colleagues; but I was upset.



I found myself feeling sorry for the Oranje's lost, feeling upset with the referee, with Spain. I got irritated when I read news about Holland losing. To conclude, I felt as sad as other (normal) Dutch people felt.

I was surprised with these facts, and asked myself "what are you, Nia?"

Here I am, questioning about my true identity. However, the fact that I might be (hopefully, partly) naturalised, I still want to go home to Indonesia. There lies my dream and future. But when is that? Only God knows.

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