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Monogamy is passe! Yes or No?

On my way to the office this morning, an article on Spits, a free newspaper, caught my attention. Monogamy is passe is written on the title. Wooooot?

I paused for a moment, trying to rethink what 'passe' actually means. I typed the word 'passe' in my Dictionary.com app on my Blackberry; and it means 'out of date'. I started reading the article, which basically stated that people are now embracing the idea of having an open relationship: men and women can have other relations apart from their official relationship.

We maybe are familiar with the word polygamy; yet this kind of open relationship, they call it 'polyamory'.

pic:3iLinG

Polyamory is the practice, desire, or acceptance of having more than one intimate relationship at a time with the knowledge and consent of everyone involved (Wikipedia)

While polygamy refers to multiple marriages, polyamory is often perceived as modern style of relationship, which is based on mutual trust, equal respect among partners, and I guess, fun, which allow multiple relationships (thus NOT multiple marriages).

Don't you think polyamory is just the nice word to legalise affair? doesn't it just mean allowing your partner (and yourself) to cheat? Imho, polyamory is just an excuse to sleep with other women, in case you are bored with yours (or with other men, in case your man is boring, getting fat, or too busy?). On Spits, it said that polyamory is not about sex; it is about love. Ah, yeah, you rite!

If polyamory is love, a proof of mutual trust and respect among partners, I guess I cannot love my partner that much. And I will not trust and respect my partner well enough due to my old-fashioned point of view on this open relationship idea. And if open relationship is the future, as stated on Spits, then let it be. But please do not make me to do so, because my kind of relationship is a close relationship.

Anyway, don't you think that having one partner is more than enough?? Can you imagine to have two or three partners that nag you about going home too late, about spending too much money, about not calling, about forgetting to leave the toilet seat up? Omg, it's too much, don't you think!?

So whatever choice you make, you should be aware of the consequences. You choose monogamy then you better stick with your partner from the moment you say 'I do' - for better, for worse. You choose for polyamory, you better 'marry' a partner that believed in the same thing and never hope that one day s/he would change to be monogamous.

The choice is yours.

Comments

Anonymous said…
Thank you for invisiblizing the experiences of asexual and grey-A polyamorous people, and for generally being a sex- and mono-supremacist jerk.

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